COMIC: Being Malaysian #2

I know this is harsh, but you know it's true.

COMIC: Being Malaysian.

Anyhow, I don't believe "boycotting" would make any difference hence I've never agreed to follow the trend. Just my 2cents.

I know currently there's no circulating news asking us to boycott, but this issue will definitely raise again. And we're going to be in the same cycle again.

And again.
and again.

Even *IF* we get the whole country to support this ridiculous-good-for-nothing movement, not only some of us will lose jobs but do you really think a country of mere 28mil can bring down those big-chained companies?

The only thing that's going to hurt is our economy.

Then we'll be back being cavemen and shit.
Yeah that's what you're aiming for right.

It's....POLLING TIME!

ALIA: I've changed my layout AGAIN (after I constructed this poll), hence this poll no longer valid! Kan?? I mean there are some votes based on the previous CotU's template...

 

 

Do you like the new layout? Tell me what you like and dislike about it in the comment section! *geek snort*

COMIC: It's okay.

COMIC: Mak, Apak and I while watching a movie....

 

COMIC: How Don interprets our sign language

 

 

HAHAHAHAHHAHA!!

Ok I just HAD to post this! He's so ridiculously funny!

Anyhow, I don't see people using this anymore. Perhaps we have evolved and adapted the more universal gesture..the Middle Finger.

COMIC: He brought me up! ...and shot me down. LOL

Yeah, gotta love him. 

<3

I love you muchoooo Don Mirra!

I has laziness.

I know I know, I've been lazy.

Yeah, I've been so fricking lazy to even breathe. LOL melampau. I have been consumed with work and I practically have killed my social life.

Ok memang sebelum ni pon tak der social life, whatevaaaa.

Anyhow, since I've got nothing to update, how about kita cerita about my new house!

YEAH!!

I'm so excited about living there I forgot how to frown! I mean the house is only like 60% complete and I'm oredi eksaited gila babeng.

Saikosis betul.

That's my grandmaaaa!

 Though there are still a lot of work to do with the house, but at least now you can see how the house really looks like!!!

Yeah, no porch for the cars.

I'm not sure whether there will be a garage for the cars or not, kalau tak dokk, kena park kat depan tu je laaaa.

Hehe..

One of the workers sorting out the ceilings or something

You see the door? You see the door?? That's my room!

WEEE!!

Fish pond or something lol

 That would be the entrance to the formal living room. And tingkap of my parents bedroom. Siap ada kolam ikan bagai.

Last last ikan tak der, tapi aku pulak yang berenang dalam tu. LOL

Dry kitchen area. Di situ lah ada island, di situ lah ada bar. Di situlah jugak ada pintu masuk from formal dining, pintu pantry and pintu storeroom periuk belanga.

Latest picture (taken last weekend) cause seeeeeeee! My momma is homeeee!! (from Hajj)

Kawasan depan rumah tu besar gila, kalau nak buat roundabout pon boleh. LOL.

Tapi mak retorted "buat apa nak buat roundabout..ni area untuk khemah-khemah for your kenduri  kawen nanti"

Mak saya nak saya kawen dah >.<





ANYHOWWWWWW, lets not talk about kenduri kawen sebab nanti saya emo. LOL

Selepas lawatan rasmi ke rumah yang separa siap itu, apak took us to my uncle's ranch which is like less than 3 mins from our new house lol.

And yes, it's a fricking ranch sebab....

ADA KUDAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

Apak sungguh berani!

Hai. Kuda ini bernama Golden what? Golden harvest? Golden horse? Mende ntah. LOLOL

He used to race tapi sekarang dah tua dan kurus.

He is so baik and jinak and very awesome. But yeah, he's a big guy and he scares me. LOL

Haha, mak gajah ni sebenarnya penakut nokkks

Tua tetapi masih lagi macho!

Oh, ni kuda padi.

 I don't really like the guy despite of his size which isn't that intimidating lol. Dia ni tak jinak sangat...I mean I dunno lah, I only pegang pegang like that only.


We didn't get to ride Mr. Golden cause...hmm, ntah, aku pon tak tau kenapa. LOL Macam tak terfikir.



Ranch tu bukan kuda je ada, kambing pon ada. LOLOLOLOL

Kambing putih ni ganas gilaaa!!

Itik, angsa, ayam, pon ada jugak.

Like waddehel, farm betul lah.

 Oh yeah, ini adalah sungai puchong.

Macam kelakar kan, tengah tengah bandar tetiba ada sungai.


Ok tu je.
Bai.


LOLOLOL
Taik betul ending.

COMIC: Smoking Turd

I really don't mind if you smoke, but stop being so fucking retarded and blow that chimney away from my face.

kthxbai.

COMIC: The proposal

My romantic proposal on how he asked me to be his wife (for the 1000th time - my estimation).

A story to be told to our generation. 

 

LOL.

I know, we are so cool like that.

COMIC: American guy and Swedish guy

LOL

These lines came from Don. 

He got the spontaneous idea (and I REALLY MEAN SPONTANEOUS!) while watching a game show where a European man was being interviewed. He (the guy) sounded as if he was struggling just to pronounce stuff.

One of Don's many sides...

It's 5:21am and I'm awake.

I have no life. I knowwwwww

Anyhowwww, lemme bore you with one of Don's genius speeches lol...

His lengthy speech is not only applicable to Amerikah...it applies to every nation, every individual. 

And yes, not only that he's hilariously funny, he is also a very boring old man.

LOLOLOLOLOL

I lap you lah monyet!

What the hell is this??

On a fine Monday afternoon.....

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?? A MASSIVE BLACK HOLE ON MY SCREEN!!!!!

...only turns out that the "Massive black hole" is my friend's nostrils...
He get on cam and the only thing I see is him picking his nose in front of the webcam. LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Yeah. I have crazy friends.

LOLOL

Random: Alia and Don on Facebook

Yeah...we're crazy like that. Aren't we awesome!! LOL!

The Legend of Ikan Tapah and how I'm so awesome LOL

I'm sure many of you Malaysians have heard about Mitos Ikan Tapah (translation: The Myth of Wallago) on how this one whole family bloodline is FORBIDDEN to eat this fish. 

I don't really know the whole story but I'm gonna try it anyway..

LAGENDA IKAN TAPAH...simplified by Alia. LOL

Yeah, it's gonna suck, you know it.

There was this one man, named Pak Kaduk, hailed from Siak, Indonesia, migrated to Malaysia. He was a very charismatic man I'm sure cause he managed to gathered a bunch of people and eventually created a neighborhood and I assume he was the chief as well.

So anyway, there was also this power-hungry Sultan whom had set his eyes on the village. He wanted the land so he can satisfy his greed. Pretty much like our politicians nowadays. No difference there.

Anyhow, since Pak Kaduk was a proud man, he never succumb to the Sultan's offer(s), thus made the Sultan very pissed off. LOL

But the Sultan was a cunning man...he knew Pak Kaduk loved to gamble (gamecock) so he made a deal with Pak Kaduk to put the village on the stake. 

"Sure" Pak Kaduk confidently said as his cock was the mightiest of all. (LOLOL sorry, it sounded dirty)

To cut the story short, Pak Kaduk lost because the Sultan switched their cocks while Pak Kaduk wasn't looking. So the village fell into the Sultan's hands. 

Pak Kaduk left shamefully and sat in a small hut besides Sungai Perak (Perak river) regretted about his stupid action. 

His train-of-regrets was halted because his beloved cat found a fish on the shore. The fish was still alive even with its bloated stomach.

Curious as his cat, he cut open the fish and wow he found a block of gold. And the fish was STILL alive even after its stomach was cut open. 

What a fish!

So he sew the fish back together and swore to the fish that none of his bloodline family can ever ever ever ever ever eat the fish and whoever did, will have to suffer from skin abnormalities/rashes/whatever. considering the fish just saved his ass (with the gold). 

And he was serious about the skin abnormalities too, none of the modern doctors, witches or shamans can fix it. The only thing that can heal the skin condition is to dunk the gold into a glass of water and the water will  magically boil and shit, then you have to drink the water.

The End.

LOLOLOL

Yeah ok, I know my story telling sucks, but who cares. I get my point across. 

But the reason why I'm telling you this is because Pak Kaduk was somewhere in my family tree. Though I am the result of a mixed marriage (meaning my mom isn't from the family line), but I still have the possibility of getting the curse. 

Anyhow, I really don't believe all of these cause I'm not superstitious and I personally think this is just another made up bedtime story. 

I mean c'mon lahh, what is the probability of a fish swallows a pot of gold?! And BE ALIVE AFTER YOU CUT IT? And you personally think the cat would call you if it sees FREE FOOD?? ALL CATS WOULD HAVE JUST EAT THE DAMN FISH RIGHT AWAY. And possibly choke to death since the fish had a block of gold la kan. LOL

The Fish

Anyway, I've drank the gold water, and it tasted like shit, no kidding. They kept the goddamn gold inside a huge clay pot and it was just so fricking dirty and urghh.

Back to my story, so 2 days ago, while celebrating Eid Adha with my mom's family, they served Wallago (Ikan Tapah) and they were like "Alia, I don't think you can eat this fish..." but they weren't too sure about the myth as well, eventhough my aunt on my dad's side had a severe skin rashes AFTER she ate the fish and was healed IMMEDIATELY after she drank the water.

That could be just coincidence and she has major allergy to the fish or something.

Anyway, I'm not saying that my family is a bunch of superstitious people cause even they weren't so sure whether to believe it or not. And my grandma was like "How about you eat it then tell us if you notice something develops on your body.." in a very serious way!! LOL I guess everybody was curious whether it's really true or not!

But it has never been proven scientifically and seriously no explanations and shit. 

Even if we look it into the religious context, one isn't supposed to gamble, and the fish is just another God given gift for us human to stay alive.

What I'm trying to say here is that, I ate the "forbidden" fish. I'm alive! 

Except that now my armpits are so fucking itchy. LOL

I have red lines on my pits that are so fucking sore and sensitive. Probably because I've been scratching it like motherfucker. 

Definitely not my body cause my boobsies are bigger. LOLOL!!

Anyhow, I'm not saying this is the result of my ignorance, it's just probably because I haven't clean them well or I'm allergic to the deodorant or I've been sweating too much since I joined aerobics classes everyday.

But this could be a great story to pass on to my children one day.

"Mamma have been cursed by the Wallago fish!!! SO BEWARE!!! DON'T EAT THE FISH! EVEN WHEN YOU'RE HALF ALIVE AND DESPERATELY NEED FOOD!!!!"

Shit

 

There were sparks came from the ceiling fan!!!!

How fucking scary was that!??!?!!?

My little sis said, the only think she could mutter was "I don't wanna die..I don't wanna die.."

LOL...

OKlah, it's only funny NOW...we were scared shitless!

Well, I was more pissed off than scared, cause it literally fried my newly bought router..there goes my RM300....

And I had both of my computers on lol (yes I know, it was my fault /SLAPS HEAD) and thank Goddddddddd nothing happens to my babies! 

...just the router.

URGH.

My dad's pride and joy (his humongous HDTV) wouldn't turn on in the first place....I was panicking like there was no tomorrow!!! I mean not even my whole year salary could afford that TV!!!

But the TV's fine...just Astro that's fucked up. 

URGH.

Anyhow, I've learned my lesson today, EXPENSIVE STUFF CAN WITHSTAND LIGHTNING STRIKES. 

LOL.

p/s: Need to buy surge protector for the WHOLE house now. THIS IS A MUST!!!!
p/ss: I've decided to upgrade my internet bandwidth...dapat new wireless router+modem LOL. Yeah, downgraded from Cisco to Riger.



Well, lightning never strikes twice in the same place.